Updated:2006-05-11 12:38:59
Excerpts from 'Mama Made the Difference'
By Bishop T.D. Jakes
'Mama Made the Difference'
Multimedia minister Bishop T.D. Jakes releases his thirtieth book, 'Mama Made the Difference,' just in time for Mother's Day. "As a Christian, I believe that motherhood is a woman’s sacred calling to collaborate with God in other human lives," Jakes said about the project.
Mamas teach us to believe in God.
Of all the life lessons my mama taught me, I can say without a doubt that one of her bedrock gifts to me was a living, breathing belief in our God. She did it with words, she did it with actions, with prayers and praises, with the way she responded to life’s hardships and trials. She did it with the joyful gleam in her eye as she would survey the beauty of His creation in the budding rosebush at the corner of our house. She taught me to believe in God when she knew I was watching her, and she taught me more powerfully on those rare occasions when she wasn’t aware of my watchful eyes. I count this as one of her greatest gifts to me because so much of life focuses on the power of belief. In fact, belief, if you ask me, just may be the greatest spiritual force that exists in all the world.
Mamas teach us the power of words.
So many of our mothers taught us the life-changing impact that language can have on our lives. Probably like your mother, mine often corrected my speech when I would use the wrong verb tense or would slip in the always forbidden ‘ain’t.’ I recall once when, after such a correction, I replied, ‘Mama, I know the correct way to speak. It’s just that I don’t want to have to feel like I’m in English class whenever I talk to you.’ She looked at me for a moment with one of those looks that only mothers can muster—you know the one, where she raises one eyebrow and her lips betray a hint of a smile when her eyes reveal skepticism. She said, ‘Words are important, son. So important that you need to handle them with great care whenever you speak, write, or read.’ And she’s right, proved out in fact by this very book, which is inspired by the impact her words of life had on me. Proved out as well by the words I am privileged to speak from the pulpit or from the podium before thousands of people. Words have indeed shaped my life as well as my life’s calling.
Mamas teach us to be responsible.
It has been said that children learn from what they see. If that is true, and I believe that it is, then I was watching a living visual aid by observing the way my mother endured hardships. Little did she know that some of my greatest lessons came from watching her not to complain or whine when the task was tough, even when she wanted to quit. As I was growing up, perhaps the foremost lesson I learned from watching her was to be responsible. I suppose I knew what the word responsibility meant long before I knew how to spell it! I knew that it meant doing what I said I would do, keeping my word, admitting my mistakes, making right a wrong I had inflicted, apologizing when needed, using common sense, being honest and taking serious things seriously. Part of my learning came from my mother’s own character and convictions—and part of it came from sheer necessity.
Mamas teach us to love ourselves.
Sometimes learning to love ourselves seems impossible. Stop for a moment and ask yourself: When was the last time you felt unloved or worthless for no apparent reason? Do you ever feel that you simply do not belong? Have you secretly felt like a misfit all of your life and never really known why? I think most of us have in one way or another, at some season of our lives along the way. Like believing in ourselves, loving ourselves can be a daunting lesson to learn, a lifelong process of growing into accepting and embracing all of who we are and were meant to be.
Mamas teach us to banish the bitterness.
Of all the barriers to experiencing love, whether romantic or relational, familial or familiar, perhaps none has deeper, more insidious roots than bitterness. My mother certainly had cause to be bitter about her life, particularly after my father became ill and could no longer provide for our family and instead became another dependent. When her daughter was diagnosed with a brain tumor, my mother could have easily become bitter. But through these trials and many more, Mama weeded her garden daily of the creeping roots of bitterness that tried to penetrate the soil of her heart. She’d tell me that she didn’t have time for self-pity and that her faith was in the Lord. She told me she was grateful for how He’d provided for her so far and knew that He wouldn’t leave her now. My mother was no saint but she helped me to learn firsthand how important it is to overcome any seeds of bitterness that might try to implant themselves within me.
Mamas teach us that it’s never too late.
Do not ever give up on your dream. Whatever you really want to achieve, to possess, to conquer, to discover, or to enjoy—go for it, and inspire others along theway. Let them see your dedication, your persistence, and your victory when you reach your goal. Tell them that they can fulfill their dreams too. Do what you can to help them. Determine that no dream is going to die in the hearts of those you love, not on your watch. Encourage them to go for it as soon as they can, even if they are fifty, sixty, or seventy. If they are still breathing, inspire them to do something great.
Tell your mama what a difference she has made.
If your mother is still living, I encourage you to call her and tell her what a difference she has made in your life. If she has already passed away, then I encourage you to write her a letter, expressing all the things that the two of you did not get a chance to discuss. Build from her legacy and launch yourself into your life with exuberant passion to accomplish the mighty things that she saw in you back when she held you in her arms. Make her proud by fulfilling the dreams that she started but did not bring to completion. And along the way, plant the seeds of dreams in your own children, knowing that someday, when you are beyond this earth, they will be carrying your legacy with them, completing what you started.
Mommy Dearest
How you can make a difference as a mama.
From MAMA MADE THE DIFFERENCE: Life Lessons My Mother Taught Me by T.D. Jakes; Published by arrangement with G.P. Putnam's Sons (April 2006, $19.95)
No comments:
Post a Comment